Today's TED talk focuses on the most rigged division in the league, the Central. Enjoy, or don't, I don't give a fuck. 

Arizona: Poverty franchise where goalies go to bust. Hart and Blackwood RIP. Nick Bjugstad is a top 6 forward for him. Dark times ahead. Good thing they have no fans. Congrats, you played yourself. 

Chicago: David wanted to be good, failed. Now he’s trying to be bad. Kinda failing at that too. He’s cornered the market on overpaid shitty goalies. Congrats, you played yourself. 

Colorado: Got some big tickets coming up. His burner account has gone quiet. No new GMs to fleece. Stagnant times in Denver. Stuart Skinner is about to be the top rated goalie ever. Congrats, you played yourself. 

Dallas: What a dumpster fire. Good. Fuck you and your 2 cups. Nice to see Simon T bend you over. Shesty, Scheifele, Lindholm, all trash. Love it. Don’t own your 1sts for a while. Congrats, you played yourself. 

Minnesota: A makeshift group of Europeans who play clean hockey. Nobody hates their own team more than Al. Larry could play on their Blueline it’s so bad. I’ve never heard of any of their prospects, neither has Al. Congrats, you played yourself. 

Nashville: This team would be elite… in 2017. Now it’s just sad. Forwards? Sad. Defence? Sad. Goalies? Painfully Sad. Their goal song should be by Sarah McLaughlin. Congrats, you played yourself. 

St Louis: This team winning a cup shows this league is rigged. Oh the guy who sims won every game? Shocker. 1 1st line and 3 4th lines. Garbage. Tristan Jarry sucks, quit editing his ratings. Congrats, you played everyone else you cheating bastard. 

Winnipeg: 1 more Marner update and I might off myself. Successfully collected the back half of all the 2023 draft picks. Bold strategy Cotton. Waiting for Jake Virtanen to make a comeback. Congrats, you played yourself.